WHITEDOVE Speaks Her Mind
Honor Your Path in Life and at Your Time of Death
November 3, 2009

When a person is called or guided to walk their path during a lifetime, regardless if they interact with a few or with many, why do they shun it in death?  This is very perplexing to me and makes me sad they did not honor their calling in death.  I am speaking my mind and yes, getting on my ‘soap box’ because I have something to say. Several who have crossed over have come to me later with regret regarding last minute decisions prior to death or the decisions of their family members or friends.

It is an honor and privilege to walk your path during your time in this life.  It is, to me, a dishonor not to acknowledge your spiritual path at the time and after your death.  There have been many in the last several years who have been called home.  VERY FEW have given information in the obituary of their aka ‘also known as’ or the church or talent or service they performed for MANY of their ‘other family’.  These ‘other family’ or clients, friends or whatever they have called them deserve to know when you have made your transition.

 Yes, I am aware family members quite often are not always thrilled with what many have done in this life and don’t want the embarrassment so only put statistics in the final notice.  Many also have come back to me, lamenting ‘if I had it to do over, I would have mentioned about my talents, my calling, my church’.  They or their family made a choice and did what was circumspect and said only what was necessary.  I do know many are also so grief stricken they want to do the easiest and most expedient and be done with it.  I also am aware the content of the obituary is edited by the newspaper.

Fortunately, many have come to me in dreams just prior to their passing and I have an indication their time is near.  Others that I am not so in tune with but would like to at least pay respect do not come in dreams nor is the unique and specific information given in the obituary.  Information filters down and we finally hear about it later.

The grief is there for all the clients, other family, friends that were helped with life altering sessions. Grief is not just for the immediate family.  The ‘wonderful and life changing talent’ each had during this life needs to be recorded, shared and remembered. 

I do realize there are extenuating circumstances that happen; expense of length of obituary, editing or special format of the newspaper, dictates of the church having the farewell service, dictates of family not wanting to be further embarrassed, didn’t think it was necessary to say more.  For the ones left behind that were helped one time or many, it is a big thing and quite a slight when they were the last to know. 
Yes, each person has a choice and I would hope that if you were proud of what your spiritual life was in this life you would make provisions for also being proud at the time of your passing. 

To me, when a person knows their time is near and they do not take advantage and make plans for alerting the many followers, it says a couple of things to me. 1) that you weren’t really proud of who and what you did; 2) you had low self-esteem and who would care; 3) you were not really into serving others and only pretending to follow your path and only after the money and or the prestige in the community or the fact that you were doing something against your families wishes. Or perhaps just lazy.

Look at most of the obituaries and you will find some only give just the statistics, others will give all the credits they ever achieved and were proud of, and others list all the family members, living and dead and sometimes heritage.  When you read an obituary you gain a lot of insight about the person who wrote it, if they were detached and didn’t know the person, a family member or the person wrote it her/himself.

Guess what I am really saying here is………..If you were living a life of service helping others in any capacity, honor that in your last recorded message, your obituary.  This is a time when one says, what career they had, what they loved to do, etc.

Below are a few of recent passings that happened locally, all known and admired by me as well as others. There are many more but this gives you an idea. None of them acknowledged their ‘other life of service’ and it was huge.  In a couple of instances, the other family wrote on the email memorial site the extent of the service that person did.

These notices were published in the Wichita Eagle and I cite them word for word as it appeared, a few others I will address only from memory but also known and admired by me.

^^^Mary Janette Briggs  (photo was attached)
     Briggs, Mary Janette, 76, retired after 39 years of service with the Federal Government, died Saturday, June 20, 2009. Service. 1 p.m., Thursday, June 25, Downing & Lahey West. Preceded in death by husband, Kenneth E Briggs. Loved by; son, William “Bill” Briggs of Wichita; daughter, Peggy Ann Moore of Covington, LA; sister, Ruth McClain of Tulsa, OK; grandson, Brandon Lee Carlson of Wichita; great-granddaughter, Alana Leigh Carlson; Lee Carlson. www.dlwichita.com Published in Wichita Eagle from 6/24-6/25/2009 

^^^Carol Waddell
Wadeell, Carol, 64. died Feb. 20, 2009. Son, James Hassel (Arnetta Bynum), Wichita; daughters, Michelle Hassel, Wichita, Dawn Keene (George), Derby, KS; brother, Bill Reece, Springfield, MO; sisters, Karen Pracht, Mulvane, KS; Betty Cole, Elkins, AR; grandchildren Amanda, Andrew, Mariah, Jacoby, Tanner, Tyler. Memorial service 4-6pm Friday, Feb 29, 2008, Botanica. Memorial to Harry Hynes Hospice. All Faiths Mortuary. Published in Wichita Eagle from 2/25-2/29/2008  (Note: At her memorial, Carol did take control and had it all planed for all of her other family, friends, clients. Wonderful to see.)

^^^Patricia Sawyer
Sawyer, Patricia, 75, homemaker and author, passed away Saturday, March 1, 2008. Memorial service 2:00 p.m., Friday at the Broadway Mortuary Chapel. Survivors; husband, Dallas D Sawyer; son, Dallas K. Sawyer and wife, Crystal; daughter, Christine Zeurn; and grandchildren, James Zeurn and Ashley Sawyer. Services by Broadway Mortuary. Published in Wichita Eagle from 3/5-3/6/2008  (Note: On Carol’s website of Pat’s church someone had graciously written all of her many contributions under the heading of “About the Founder and Executive Director’)

^^^Mary Greene   (Photo was attached. I do not have copy of the obituary but remember some about it) Only the facts were given, date of death, no cause, listed family members and preceded in death by husband KC Green.  Mary Greene’s aka was TiMar and she and KC were close friends of mine for many years when we would travel the ‘Psychic Circuit’ from Texas to Colorado and points between.  TiMar was also an author, “Travel the Winds” and very well known in MUFON and spoke at some of the ET conventions in the 1990’s.  She had many followers here in Wichita and interacted with Bezon and a group of Light Beings.  Bezon and the Light Being group are still very active all over.  *See other article “I Remember TiMar’

I could go on and on but I think you all have an idea this rankles. To some degree, we know, not all appreciate what we do but when we don’t honor what we do when we have the opportunity, what does that say about us as a person and our life.  It took some months for me to tone down just what I would say.  Even now, I had to keep deleting and rewriting.  This isn’t perfect yet, but it does get the point across.  I intend to put it on my website www.whitedovemsg.com for others to see and perhaps a seed will be planted for others to take notice and do something now. Yes, my daughter and family will address this on my website at some future date when it becomes necessary.. I hope to have this put on the www.alternativeholisticfair.webs.com site for further planting of seeds to family and those walking their path.

Blessings to each, may you all be proud and honor who you are and your life of service.
Henria Zavena Whitedove Smith